I have heard that there are different types of swinging, can you explain that to me?

August 27th, 2008 | AnnaMiller | Questions and Answers

Great question! When we started swinging, we didn’t know that there were different “levels” available to us, we thought that sex was basically the only option, so we jumped in with both feet! Later we found out that other couples had different levels, and rules. It’s really up to you and your partners comfort levels.

Same Room No Swap Sex Only
Some couples are only comfortable with having sex with their own partner, but they will do it in a room with other swingers present.

Soft Swinging
Foreplay with other partners, sometimes including oral sex but no vaginal penetration. Can add spice to a couple’s relationship and allow them to have fun without having full intercourse with other partners. Many couples start out as soft swingers as they first explore swinging. But don’t think that soft swingers will always convert to full swapping.

Full Swap, Same Room
Partners swap and have sex in the same room, or bed. This includes orgies and is great for exhibitionists and voyeurs, who can show off or just enjoy watching their partner play. Couples in this group may enjoy watching their partner have sex as well as being watched by their partner. Some people find open swinging allows for total release of the sexual desires and fantasies. It is not for the jealous or the shy!

Full Swap, Different Rooms
Partners swap, but have sex in separate rooms. Closed swinging allows for a more intimate experience. Some people feel it allows them more freedom to explore and fewer interruptions of their enjoyment. Some couples will do this only at house parties, where they are still in the same house, but have the freedom to have sex with others in different or private rooms.

Cheating Dirt Bag
OK, I just had to throw this in here too! When someone writes to us and tells us that they are a swinger but their spouse isn’t, and they want to meet us to “swing” but we can’t let their spouse know about it, or when someone tells us that their sexual drive is to much for their spouse and that they are looking into other means to satisfy their needs. Basically if your wife or husband doesn’t know your having sex behind their back, then you and not any type of swinger, just someone who cheats on their partner, and you fall into this category!

Swinging at any level is about trust, and honesty, it’s about openness, and being able to share your experiences, and desires with your partner.